Someone at work today, asked me if I missed India. I never thought I would hear that question. Usually they ask if I liked it or not. To that, my reponse is usually that it was “intense,” but today, I had to think about missing that place.
So, what do I miss? I miss its lawlessness, how you could be let off the hook so easy, just with a small bribe for the officer. I miss the ordered chaos. You never had to have a dull moment if you didn't want it. Rest, relaxation, forget about it.... There was no false sense of safety or security, even from the backseat of a rickshaw (how many child beggars or purse snatchers did we have to fend off?). For me, India was not just an assault on the senses, but an assault on me.
The city of contrasts pushed me to my limits. I was at my best, and I was at my worst. India pressurized me, like a diamond in the mine. Someone once told me that they saw me in my “growing up” process there, and I scowled. I didn't like what she said one bit, I refused it, but she was right -India did help me to grow up, and I finally understood what it meant to own my womanhood.
And you know how, when you're a kid, you say what you want to be, before anyone tells you that you should be a banker, doctor, or lawyer... And you know how that's usually your heart's purest desire? Well, when I was a kid, I saw a map in a book, and if there was anywhere in the world I could go to, I said I would choose colorful India.
It sounds crazy, but I always knew that Incredible India was meant for me. I just never could have imagined how it would happen in my lifetime.
And now, starting to adjust and introduce myself in Shanghai, it's feels so natural to share, these moments in India that defined me.
So yes, today... India, you are missed.
